my thoughts

going through my days,

my thoughts always find their way

back to her.

she would have loved

my speedo bartender.

she would love how long and blonde

ned's hair is getting.

we kept up with each other's lives

on a regular basis,

never letting too much time pass.

i helped her to see the humor in things.

she helped me to see things honestly.

our conversations framed our lives,

validated our friendship,

gave us the fuel to get back in there.

and now, so much has happened,

including her death.

i want to pick up the phone

and call her.

i want to talk to her about it,

about everything.

i stumbed upon this post today

with these old pictures

missy loved the sun, the sweet summertime.

today, i let the sun soak in deep.

feeling it for both of us.

feeling her warmth.

and now, i have a touch of sunburn,

warming me still.

her sister recently sent me a message,

that surprised us both

as we pieced together 

parts of the past.

it is clear to us that she is

making herself known.  

setting things up for us to discover,

these amazing coincidences.

then, earthbound,

we squint up toward the sky,

unsure where to look,

but certain that she's watching.

i missed a call the other day.

it was aliana.

but my phone told me that

missy called. 

♥